Wednesday, December 21, 2005

How to regulate your way to prosperity

Although in my previous post I suggested that blowing up the world was the solution to everything, in the meantime, I've got some brilliant ideas on how to cure poverty.

To begin with, we'll get a Bill passed in Parliament, the "End Poverty Bill". It stipulates that no-one is allowed to live in poverty. Pretty simple, really? And it's guaranteed to pass because everyone who votes against it can labelled as "wanting poverty to continue". How inconsiderate of them!

Next, we'll immediately raise the minimum wage to $20 an hour, and increase holiday pay to 8 weeks. More money, more holidays. Ahhh, isn't the Government so kind to offer us that? We'll be a high wage, well-rested economy in no time. Hmm. A 25 hour working week seems tempting too...

Because rich people are evil exploiting scum, income over $75,000 will be taxed at 100%. This will generate a huge amount of cash to spend on social spending. You can never have enough social spending.

Wait a second. I'm being a bit harsh here. Let me start over.


Okay, the minimum wage should be $50 an hour and you get 20 weeks holiday. Whoa, that's more like it. It'll make a difference for thousands of Kiwis? Make that *millions* of Kiwis.

Wait, why stop there?

Okay okay okay. My final proposal. 52 weeks of pure holiday. Every week everyone will be paid enough to live in luxury. How do we fund this? Simple. The rich can pay for it all. And don't forget that these people will be contributing to the economy by spending! Why do we need to work anyway? We can make all our economic effort by just spending. Whee. This'll be great.


Blogger Heine said...

Heh, the French were almost that bad!

12:48 PM  
Blogger Duncan Bayne said...

IdiotSavant, you might have told us you were starting another blog!

3:19 PM  

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